Meltdown!!

So about a week ago I had a complete meltdown + argument with my mom it blew up way bigger than I thought it would. Anyways I have so much pain and anger inside me and its boilinh over I've been doing all I can for years to controll it and keep it in check but nothing I do has been working. Ive always felt bursting into tears but I knew in my heart that one if I started crying I wouldn't be able to stop. So I decided never to show my emotions never cry net let anything people say or do to you bother you just let it roll off your back by hey they pushed mr further off the cliff I keep telling people one day I'm going to be dead and one day your going to say or do the wrong thing to me and regret every single word if I end up like seriously pissed off serial killer to be honest that's how I feel I feel like killing them all. Everyone acts like it's okay to treat any kind of way that it doesn't bother me that it doesn't hurt hun let me tell you this my heart can't take anymore and my heart can't break anymore if it was already broken to begin with. Treat me properly or one day everyone is going to regret they never met me make my life a living hell raising nightmare and I'll give it back it to you skme much worse that devil can you don't want to piss me off you don't want to be my enemy. I had a big strong heart but all everyone did was break it over and over again till there wasnt anything left I used to smile but now its so fake that even underworld noticed but not one person cares enough to stop hurting me